The Unique Piece

Well, something is ‘kinda the same’ anywhere in the world: You sit in front of a laptop not inspired whatsoever... holding a glass of water, listening to music, and it just comes to you... whether you grasp it or not... like the wind, a breeze carrying a memory. And it becomes a quest, if not a question: do you want to go back there or stare at the screen... have a sip of water... Which brings me to Covent Garden... I am looking for a restaurant now. Unsure of what I want to eat, unsure whether I’m in reality looking for a restaurant or some company, someone who understands.

I realize I am not really looking for a restaurant... I hold on tight to the fantasy of not knowing what I am actually looking for... In order to avoid the fear of not finding what, in fact, I am looking for. And that is when the ice cream cone will just do. Sitting down in the square, I start watching people and feel like I am the only puzzle piece out of the puzzle.

The scenery is ‘always’ magnificent to watch... It almost fills the emptiness I feel inside. Almost. It is London. Twilight invites the thin rain that wets my scenery. I carry the song, get up and head for the tube station. I hear the loud laughter of those already drunk. I imagine what my laughter would sound like in that scenery. But what would make me laugh when representing the unique part of the puzzle that doesn’t seem to fit. The matchless piece. The one whose colors don’t blend with the rest.

I felt unwelcome to that Friday’s night party, and perhaps Saturday would be the same, and Sunday...

Monday would definitely unwelcome me with locked emotions, locked in a fluorescent room, facing the rain drops outside... The traffic jam... Oh I look through the window dreaming being right there in the middle of it all. The unique, invisible piece trying to blend in with the purple and red outside... If only the stars started to fall down, so we could get in the elevator in a hurry to leave. I had planned to get up quickly, get my coat, and run as fast as I could... But the sky had no stars yet and they wouldn’t fall down and disrupt a Monday... or would they? Or would they?...